Dear Sir,

I would like to campaign for men’s rights to be Mrs. Claus!!

Over the years I have received many “ho-ho-ho’s” from females responding to my pathetic attempts at being romantic and as much as I admire, respect and prefer the company of the opposite sex, I do believe they have the right to be men, even if that is only for one night and I have the right to become a woman, just for one night.

If a woman can be a brilliant Prime Minister, Santa would be a doddle for them. When I was younger and if a bird (now a 21st century none PC description) slithered down my chimney on Christmas Eve, I would have been the happiest little 28 year old in Aycliffe experiencing my best Christmas Eve ever.

Yours sincerely

Satan Lucas

AKA Honest John xx